Sorrow crushed me. A feeling akin to nausea churned in my stomach. My head ached, the pressure building like it would explode. Tears spilled over the lower lids of my eyes, sliding down my cheeks and falling onto the front of my shirt. Grief had broken my heart. No, it wasn’t a death, though I have known that grief in recent years. It wasn’t rejection or failure.  My sadness was the result of the dysfunction and suffering that I saw being visited on so many in my pastoral care by those who love themselves more than God, who stubbornly persist in their own ways with no regard for the destruction they are creating, who live only for this moment with no concern for eternity. It is a good grief, for it causes me to seek God more intensely, to love beyond my own affection.

Grief is a powerful emotion which we all experience differently, depending on our temperament, our training, and our culture. When I have funeral services I observe some families going stoically through the rituals, others work hard to keep things light with jokes and stories about the deceased.  Still others grieve loudly, with tears and crying. When I grieve, my family takes refuge! I usually experience grief like a violent thunderstorm. I sob, attempt to pray with gasps, groans, and unintelligible words. I become a total human wreck for a few moments . . . then it’s over! Bev and I smile about how irrational that I become when I am in the grip of grief for those few moments. It’s a tragicomedy!

Grief has purpose. Allowing ourselves to grieve also allows God to work in us.  Psalm 147 was addressed the exiles from Judah, who mourned the destruction of their nation, their culture, and their lives. But, sang of divine comfort. “The Lord is rebuilding Jerusalem and bringing the exiles back to Israel. He heals the brokenhearted, binding up their wounds. He counts the stars and calls them all by name. How great is our Lord! His power is absolute! His understanding is beyond comprehension!”   Note the juxtaposition of God’s work in the healing of the broken-hearted and the counting the stars! The Psalmist knew that grief rearranges our thinking, creating new possibilities in knowing our Abba.  Yes, it is true that when grief is unrelieved, when we find no comfort, it can wreak havoc in us;  emotionally, physically, and even spiritually. If we remain suffocated in the present darkness of sorrow without friends to help us or faith to guide, we can die. But, God will, if we let Him, heal our broken heart.

Are you enduring a broken heart today?
Been betrayed by a friend?
Experienced the separation of death?
Enduring disappointment as prayers apparently go unanswered, hopes are left unfulfilled?

It’s all right to mourn! Do not let anyone tell you that grief is ungodly! Sorrow is part of the human experience and must not be denied.  Some of God’s plans and purposes for us cannot be accomplished without our hearts being broken. The difference in experiencing sorrow in the life of the Christian is two-fold: we have a Healer who is Mighty, and we do not grieve hopelessly!

Are you sorrowful today?  Me, too.  Disappointment and empathy have converged in my life and I am heavy-hearted.  But, I am not hopeless!  So, I will wait out the storm of grief.  I will hold onto faith. As surely as the sun will slide  over the eastern horizon,  God will give a new day, a fresh beginning- “He heals the brokenhearted!”  As hope returns, God gives us a song to sing again. We learn to live joyfully – albeit differently -transformed by grief.

Take this word from the Word. Pray that God will use your grief to make you desire Him even more.  We each have a choice in our grief. It can make us bitter, or it can make us broken; leading us to a place where we find Him closer than ever before. ” Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows.” (2 Corinthians 1:3-5, NIV)

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Often you’ve wondered why

Tears come into your eyes

And burdens seem to be

Much more than you can stand

But God is standing near

He sees your falling tears

Tears are a language God understands

When grief has left you low

It causes tears to flow

Things have not turned out

The way that you had planned

But God won’t forget you

His promises are true

Tears are a language God understands

Gordon Jensen

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